The Golden Asse
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as she had done by divers other persons, it fortuned that Socrates
did fall asleepe, and slept very soundly, by reason of his travell and
plenty of meat and wine wherewithall hee had filled him selfe.
Wherefore I closed and barred fast the doores of the chamber, and
put my bed behinde the doore, and so layed mee downe to rest.
But I could in no wise sleepe, for the great feare which was in my
heart, untill it was about midnight, and then I began to slumber.
But alas, behold suddenly the chamber doores brake open, and
locks, bolts, and posts fell downe, that you would verily have
thought that some Theeves had been presently come to have
spoyled and robbed us. And my bed whereon I lay being a truckle
bed, fashioned in forme of a Cradle, and one of the feet broken and
rotten, by violence was turned upside downe, and I likewise was
overwhelmed and covered lying in the same. Then perceived I in
my selfe, that certaine affects of the minde by nature doth chance
contrary. For as teares oftentimes trickle downe the cheekes of
him that seeth or heareth some joyfull newes, so I being in this
fearfull perplexity, could not forbeare laughing, to see how of
Aristomenus I was made like unto a snail [in] his shell. And while I
lay on the ground covered in this sort, I peeped under the bed to
see what would happen. And behold there entred in two old
women, the one bearing a burning torch, and the other a sponge
and a naked sword; and so in this habit they stood about Socrates
being fast asleep. Then shee which bare the sword sayd unto the
other, Behold sister Panthia, this is my deare and sweet heart,
which both day and night hath abused my wanton youthfulnesse.
This is he, who little regarding my love, doth not only defame me
with reproachfull words, but also intendeth to run away. And I
shall be forsaken by like craft as Vlysses did use, and shall
continually bewaile my solitarinesse as Calipso. Which said, shee
pointed towards mee that lay under the bed, and shewed me to
Panthia. This is hee, quoth she, which is his Counsellor, and
perswadeth him to forsake me, and now being at the point of death
he lieth prostrate on the ground covered with his bed, and hath
seene all our doings, and hopeth to escape scot-free from my
hands, but I will cause that hee will repente himselfe too late, nay
rather forthwith, of his former intemperate language, and his
present curiosity. Which words when I heard I fell into a cold
sweat, and my heart trembled with feare, insomuch that the bed
over me did likewise rattle and shake. Then spake Panthia unto
Meroe and said, Sister let us by and by teare him in pieces or tye
him by the members, and so cut them off. Then Meroe (being so
named because she was a Taverner, and loved wel good wines)
answered, Nay rather let him live, and bury the corpse of this poore
wretch in some hole of the earth; and therewithall shee turned the
head of Socrates on the other side and thrust her sword up to the
hilts into the left part of his necke, and received the bloud that
gushed out, into a pot, that no drop thereof fell beside : which
things I saw with mine own eyes, and as I thinke to the intent that
she might alter nothing that pertained to sacrifice, which she
accustomed to make, she thrust her hand down into the intrals of
his body, and searching about, at length brought forth the heart of
my miserable companion Socrates, who having his throat cut in
such sort, yeelded out a dolefull cry, and gave up the ghost. Then
Panthia stopped up the wide wound of his throat with the Sponge
and said, O sponge sprung and made of the sea, beware that thou
not passe by running river. This being said, one of them moved and
turned up my bed, and then they strid over mee, and clapped their
buttocks upon my face, and all bepissed mee until I was wringing
wet. When this was over they went their wayes, and the doores
closed fast, the posts stood in their old places, and the lockes and
bolts were shut againe. But I that lay upon the ground like one
without soule, naked and cold, and wringing wet with pisse, like to
one that were more than half dead, yet reviving my selfe, and
appointed as I thought for the Gallowes, began to say Alasse what
shall become of me to morrow, when my companion shall be found
murthered here in the chamber? To whom shall I seeme to tell any
similitude of truth, when as I shall tell the trueth in deed? They will
say, If thou wert unable to resist the violence of the women, yet
shouldest thou have cried for help; Wouldst thou suffer the man to
be slaine before thy face and say nothing? Or why did they not slay
thee likewise? Why did they spare thee that stood by and saw
them commit that horrible fact? Wherefore although thou hast
escaped their hands, yet thou shalt not escape ours. While I
pondered these things with my selfe the night passed on, and so I
resolved to take my horse before day, and goe forward on my
journey.
Howbeit the wayes were unknown to me, and thereupo
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