why does sour cream have an expiry date?...Full Article
Upon landing hard, the pilot got on the PA system, Sorry, folks for the hard landing. It wasnt my fault, blame it on the asphalt.On this particular flight, the airline pilot noted that he had hammered...Full Article
At age 4, success is..................not peeing in your pants.At age 12, success is..................having friends.At age 20, success is..................having sex.At age 35, success is...............Full Article
An Englishman, a Scott, and a Irishman walked into a pub.Each orderd a pint of beer . Then a fly landed in each ones beer . The Englishman, turning slightly green, pushed his beer away and asked for ...Full Article
Attending a wedding for the first time, a little girl whispered to her mother, Why is the bride dressed in white? Because white is the color of happiness and today is the happiest day of her life. Her...Full Article
A little kid asks his father, Daddy, is God a man or a woman? Both son. God is both. After a while the kid comes again and asks, Daddy, is God black or white? Both son, both. The child returns a few m...Full Article
Can a teacher give a homeless man homework?...Full Article
If 7-11(pharmacy) is open 24/7 then why do they have locks on their doors?...Full Article
I recently picked a new primary care physician. After two visits andexhaustive lab tests, he said I was doing fairly well for my age. Alittle concerned about that comment, I couldnt resist asking him,...Full Article
If you love something, set it free. If it comes back, it was, and always will be yours. If it never returns, it was never yours to begin with. If it just sits in your room, messes up your stuff, eats ...Full Article
If nobody is perfect, and Im a nobody, am I perfect?...Full Article
A good friend will bail you out of jail.A great friend will be in the cell next to you saying,Damn, that was fun!...Full Article
1. Capmbells Soup Condoms: Mmm, mmmm, good...2. Coca Cola Conddoms: the real thing.3. Diet pepsi Condoms: You got the right one, baby.4. Double Mint: Double your pleasure, Double your fun!5. Energize...Full Article
Why are they calledapartments if they are joined together?An archaeologist is a besthusband a woman can get. As older she grows, the more interested he isin her.A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax ...Full Article
Looking back over the years that weve been together,I cant help but wonder:...-- What was I thinking?Congratulations on your wedding day!...-- Too bad no one likes your wife.How could two people as be...Full Article
Be nice to your children. They are the ones who choose your old folks home....Full Article
Chicken is the only animal we eat before it is borne and after it is dead....Full Article
When a newly wedded man is happy, we understand why. When a man, after ten years of marriage, is happy, we dont understand why. Its all a question of time!...Full Article
We are born naked, wet and hungry. During the years everything becomes worst....Full Article
Men are like toilets. Either they are taken or they are full of shit!!...Full Article